Transcript

On a windswept cliff face in Bavaria in 1535 AD, a lone blonde woman stared off into the forest. Her long, bushy hair blew around her face, as did her khaki cloak.

“Rebecca! Fancy meeting me here,” chimed the same woman, this time with a jaw-length bob haircut, a turtleneck and a trenchcoat.

“Wasn’t expecting to want to see this twice,” said the first Rebecca Black. “Love our new hair!”

“Thanks! It’s not too Thirteenth Doctor?” asked the second Rebecca Black.

“Who?” asked the first woman. “Oh. You brought Maeve. That’s… a thing.”

“Ah, you know how she will be. She insisted.”

“Um, hi,” said an older, business-suit-wearing Maeve, raising a hand. “I think I’m from your future. —Although since this is the late Middle Ages I guess we’re all from the—“

“Remember the rules of time travel, Maeve,” interrupted the first Rebecca, “no interference—“

“—No information!” continued the second Rebecca.

“Right, right, sorry.”

“Girls, it’s time,” said the first Rebecca, looking upward. “I mean, of course it’s time. I mean, it’s now. The event.”

Published On: May 13, 2026

Too Thirteenth Doctor

I realized fairly soon after her creation that having a blonde time-traveller who's a bit scattered and older than she looks was a little reminiscent, if you know what I mean.

I personally loved Jodie Whittaker's Doctor Who--the writing, less so--so I figured what the hell, lean into it, why not.

Rebecca has previously explained that one can freely travel into the past and step on all the butterflies one desires: all that will accomplish is to create new parallel universes, as all of our choices do, and since you're not the you who lives there it doesn't make a shiny bit of difference. So the rules of time travel they're talking about here forbid gossip, which is a stronger and more insidious universal force than goofy old paradox, as everyone knows.

The most insidious universal force is, of course, verb tenses. Or rather, it will be.

Transcript

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